A Mother's Intuition

When I was still an infant, and even as a young child, my mother would always say to me, "Who will be king someday?" This is one my most treasured memories of my mother. My parents told me that they named me after a great conqueror. It was not until recently that I have come to understand why they chose such a name. If you have ever read Freakonomics, then you will know that a name has quantitatively been proven to attribute to one's future. Ever since I can recall, I remember my mother standing me up, and reciting to me, "Who will be king someday?" Back when I was young, I always took it as I was special and I was the little prince who got what he wanted. Although, I never did really get what I wanted.

The reason that I have come to see why my mother would say these words to me everyday was not to boost my ego or give me some sense of a god complex; rather, it was to tell me that I can accomplish great things. The upper class and nobility of the medieval times were remembered for what they accomplished, and some of the greatest of them often started from nothing. In her own way, I believe that my mother was telling me to accomplish something great.

When I was in middle school, I did not do so well in class. In fact, I was on the verge of failing most of them. My teachers always repeated the same line to my parents, "He knows the material, but he just doesn't do the work." They would often tell my parents that I would probably end up failing out of school and not amounting to much. Well, something triggered in high school, because I went from getting failing grades, to being on honor roll for 4 years straight. I guess I finally had a goal to work towards, college, and that always pushed me ahead.

But until recently, I still had not really grasped what my mother was telling back then. Over the past couple of months, I have accomplished more than I could have foreseen  I have made a complete 180 degree turnaround in my life. Through sheer determination and self resolve, I have changed. I used to not worry about anything but my mind, which is the complete antithesis of my teachers' early predictions, but now I focusing not only maintaining a sharp and witty mind, but also physical and emotional health. All three are needed to live, and I was only living 1/3 of my life up until now.

When I reflect back on the last few months, I see that I have accomplished a great deal of my goals. I have come out to all my friends, and even new people who I have met (full disclosure for all). I have started focusing not only on my intellectual health, but my physical health, too. I am looking closely at what I eat, and I have done a lot of research on different types of activities to stay healthy. I have also been able to focus on my heart. I came out to someone that I had an attraction to. While the feelings were not reciprocated, I at least allowed all of my emotional shields to come down and put my true, inner self out. Finally, I have clear direction on where my next career goal is. In a few months, I will begin filling out graduate school applications. I have come to realize, with some consoling from a close mentor, that I will not be able to achieve the type of career that I am looking for without completing my graduate studies.

When I reflect on all of this, I see that in four months, I have done a great deal. My goal of this blog was to inspire people, but I did not believe that I would inspire myself throughout the process. I am not sure what lies ahead of me, yet. However, I know that if set my mind to something, I can accomplish anything. In a way, I guess my mother does live on. I always think back to that one question and think, "How can I accomplish something great?"

Change for Yourself

Well, it has been a long time since I last posted. It's been a onerous past couple of months, and I am sorry that I have not posted anything for some time now. I have been really depressed lately, and it just took some time for me to get over it. When I started this journey, I knew it was going to be tough. Not that I was afraid, but I knew that I would have to keep on myself and always push myself to continue moving forward. I think that over the past couple of months, I somehow lost that vision. However, during lunch, I read an article that inspired me to do something that I have been preaching since the start of this blog. The article is:

http://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20130606150641-658789-9-qualities-of-truly-confident-people?&affiliate=&

Although the article is about confidence, it also silently conveyed another theme to me. The theme is change. The author gives his opinion about which qualities define confidence. However, the author, in my opinion, would not have written the article, unless he wanted the audience to first understand what confidence is, but more importantly, to understand that they can change. Very few acts are committed without purpose. 

This article inspired me to change. For the past few months, I have not worked on many of my goals, but now I am going to change. I have preached from the beginning of this blog about change and improving yourself, but I have lost that spirit. It is because of that I would like to offer up my own personal view of change. 

Change is not a simple completion of one task or event. Change is constant. Change is not the mere occurrence of a singular event, but the culmination of the same event in repetition. Change is evolution. Evolution did not happen over one night, nor one month; evolution takes time. Therefore change will take time, and it will not be an instantaneous achievement that one can hope to obtain. Change is for yourself, and no other. Only you can change you.

I also would like to take the time to thank one of my dearest friends. She is the editor of this blog, Amy. She has always pushed me so that I would not fall off my path. For that, I am truly thankful to call her one of my best friends. Thank you, Amy!